A Tribute to Michael

by Betty Sanchez-Agramonte

     I have heard that angels sometimes disguise themselves as humans and come to earth to fulfill a mission.  My son Michael could have been one of those angels.  From the day that he was born, there was something very special about him that caught everyone’s attention.  As years went by, he became the kind of person that you would want to be around, always smiling, making you laugh, and most of all, full of compassion for others. 

     At the end of his freshman year, we received a letter from his homeroom teacher wanting us to know how special Michael had been that year.  He quoted “Michael has risen above his classmates as a person of integrity and character.  He thinks before he speaks or acts, is concerned about those around him and has a great awareness of what is and is not appropriate.  He has been a great example of what a true gentleman is and has shown the courage to act that way every day this year.  Michael has a sense of peace, security and confidence that can only come from a loving and caring up-bringing.  You have given Mike something that can’t be bought or otherwise attained and yet will last him a lifetime.  For his positive affect on my class this year I thank you and congratulate you”.

     I can still picture Michael looking after everyone in school and playing the clown when friends were sad to make them laugh. One could not be mad or sad around him.  Michael loved his family, his friends, music, sports, and just life itself.  He savored every moment, as if he knew this life would be cut short. 

     On June 13, 2001, Michael attended an end of the school year party where alcohol was available to teenagers between the ages of 14 and 18.  He was 17 at the time.  Kids who attended the party told us that both parents were home.  Michael consumed alcohol and when it was time to go home, he left with a friend who was also intoxicated.  They never made it home.  The driver lost control of the car and hit a tree on the passenger side, where my son was sitting.  The impact was so great that the car split in two and my son was killed instantly.  The driver has been in a coma since.

     It is my opinion that the Florida law regarding house parties is absurd.  Everyone who serves alcohol in a home or establishment must take responsibility for those who leave intoxicated.  And, teenagers should not be permitted to drink alcohol period, it’s illegal.  

     We, as parents, must unite to prevent this kind of tragedy from happening again.  Before your child attends a party, make sure parents are home and that they adhere to zero alcohol tolerance for youth.

     I dreamed of seeing my son grow up, graduate from high school and college, get married, and have children.  This is the normal life that parents look forward to.  Now, I can only wish that others get that chance.  Yet, somehow, I feel that Michael is an angel that is always around us and his mission to touch hearts in a very special way here on Earth was completed.

Natalia Alexis Jackson

Natalia Alexis Jackson was 17 when she was killed by a drunk driver.  Natalia was a talented vocalist who sang in church and school choirs.  She was a soloist and the only one from South Florida chosen to perform at the Florida National Music Association in Tallahassee .  Natalia had visions of a career in law and/or music.  When she questioned her mother as to how she could do both, her mother answered that when she was stressed from practicing law she could then sing her frustrations away.

     Natalia was your typical young person, academically bright, warm, caring intense, fun loving, confident, moody, opinionated and passionate about all types of music.  She and I spent quality time together at every opportunity; in a word she was my twin, in fashion tastes, some music, travel, etc.  We also were close in spirit. She watched me pray in our personal devotional and knew whenever I faced a crisis.  She also had a great sense of timing and knew when I was sad and knew the right thing to say.   She had a capacity for deep empathy.  Deeply spiritual, Natalia asked many questions, some philosophical, some about God, heaven, death and everything else.  I must admit I did not always have answers. And I was honest about my inadequacies.

     Sabbath celebration was part of our routine.   We had a beautiful Sabbath meal on March 6, 1999 at our church.  Natalia was radiant; she helped serve the elderly and spent the afternoon visiting the sick and shut-in of our congregation.  As we traveled home, we talked about Jamaica , which she had visited.  Natalia and I reminisced about family here and our many relatives living in Canada , Bahamas and the United Kingdom (England ).

     We talked about her career aspirations and I encouraged her dreams.   I was experiencing a time of spiritual rebirth myself and I took particular pride at watching her blossom. 

     We returned to church later that Sabbath afternoon for a young people's meeting.  Natalia asked to spend the evening with friends and I reluctantly consented.  I thought it would be unfair to deny Natalia valuable time with her friends.  She was so good and so compliant.  We celebrated the closing of the Sabbath with a vesper service.

     As we separated we made that connection of saying goodbye and I was a bit sad because I was heading home to an empty house. 

     Natalia never called home as I thought she would. It was 11:00 pm and her dad inquired about her and I casually remarked that she was with her friends. I became troubled and called the family with whom she had gone to spend the evening and was told there was an accident and that they had received a call from Ryder Trauma Center . I calmly drove to Jackson Memorial Hospital where after several chaotic hours of misinformation and what seemed to be a thousand questions the doctors broke the news of my daughter's death.

      From there I started the longest walk in my life, the walk with my dear friend Deanna Moss to the morgue. The doctors stated they tried to save her, but I believe she was dead on arrival (DOA) because she suffered much trauma to her upper body.

     Natalia was a passenger in a car with two friends.  She never learned to drive and never owned an auto.  She was on her way home when the small Datsun was hit on the passenger side by a late model Impala.  She never stood a chance as the car gunned through the red light. 

     I was told that Natalia spent her last hours on earth watching the British version of Cinderella, happy ever after.

     And, I fully remember that one of her favorite songs, by the group Boyz to Men is "It’s Hard to Say Goodbye", because that is my reality. 

     Even in the midst of a cohesive family and community support, it must be said that grieving is a very personal journey. As a person of faith, I trust the Omniscient, Omnipresent, sovereign God, to help me make sense of things that are now incomprehensible. Even when there are no answers, I look forward to a day when pain and death are vanquished, a time when I won’t spend sleepless nights, or sorrow filled days. I look forward to not having to attend any more funerals of those we love dearly.

     It is reassuring to know that the former things shall be no more as the promises of the God of peace are promises I hold dearly.

     So as our beloved daughter lies in dreamless sleep, we too look forward to a bright future…the reunion.